Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own

Wow. The Grammys were pretty surprising tonight. Not that U2 won practically every major category; but that most of the performances were pretty good.

The Gorillaz were cool--but I was spoiled by the fact that I've seen it already done in the MTV-Europe awards.

Madonna? Boy, does she look old in HD.

U2's Vertigo was okay, although Bono's getting a bit old as well. His voice didn't meld well with Mary J. Blige in One, but it gave me goosebumps anyway. Too bad Larry Mullen, Jr. was cut off by the NARAS president. Boo! Who wants to hear a suit when we could hear Larry talk?

Keith Urban was surprisingly good--and I hate country music.

Happy for Kelly, sad for Gwen. She looked like she was about to cry when they were going through the nominees for album of the year.

Fun to hear Helter Skelter from Paul McCartney. I remember first hearing it on Rattle and Hum: "This is a song Charles Manson stole from the Beatles, we're stealing it back." Ah, memories. =) Sir Paul also kicked in Numb/Encore. Although he looked kinda awkward trying to fit in with the young 'uns.

Jennifer Love-Hewitt looked a bit creepy in HD. Honestly, her face seems like a perfect triangle, kind of alien-looking. I liked her better when she was nice and round--Fergie looked a lot better.

Oh, and although Kanye West is annoying, his Gold Digger number was amazing. Credit goes to Jaime Foxx, though.

Randy Jackson! Playing bass! Sly Stone was all sorts of scary; Joss Stone was hot. So was Ciara. Maroon 5 looked stiff and uncomfortable.

Did I mention Madonna looked old in HD?

Steelers Win!!!!*

Well, I guess my "Curse of the Pitchman" theory didn't pan out. Of course, early in the game I saw the Disney ad...and it had Matt Hasselbeck and Shaun Alexander in it! Oy. I got a funny feeling then and there...

...and then all the NFL-produced ads had Porter, Roethlisberger, Cowher and Bettis in the first half, while the Seahawk players were only in a montage. Hmm. Something fishy there.

Then I saw the blown call on the first Seattle touchdown, the blown call on the Ben Roethlisberger "touchdown", and the blown holding call.

"But there was a quarter left to play!" Steeler fan would say. However, that was a game-changing call right there. One-yard line, Alexander gets in...then it's Steelers, 3 points down, and Cowher starts to put his hands around his throat.

Do you hear Joey Porter complaining about the officiating? Nope.

So, I'm happy Sgt Slaughter won. But to an unbiased party like me, I'm thinking this was a smelly win.

Superbowl: The Curse of the Pitchman

Well, we're finally at Superbowl weekend. Steelers-Seahawks. Yawn. I'm torn as to who to root for--Bill Cowher, because he totally deserves it? Or the Seahawks, because I want to wipe the smirk off Joey Porter's face?

Anyway, I have a pet theory about the NFL right now: if you appear in a commercial, you're not winning the championship. Let's see...

Chicago Bears: Had an ad for NFL Networks. Gone.
Peyton Manning: The silly, but endearing Mastercard commercials. Gone.
Donovan McNabb: Chunky soup? Boy, did his career go downhill after that. Gone.
Terrell Owens: Made a deodorant commercial, where he was "odor". Wonder if he realized that. Gone.
Chad Johnson: Fathead. Gone.
New England Patriots: That beer commercial (Coors?). Gone.

Tom Brady deserves special mention, since he not only made that stupid Visa commercial, but was also on Family Guy. Bing-bong! as Stewie said. Anyway, he and his Pats are gone (see above), and now he has a sports hernia.

Which brings us to the Steelers and Seahawks.

Steelers have Big Ben Roethlisberger (however you spell that) doing Fathead, and Jerome Bettis doing that asthma PSA.

Seahawks have...nobody. It's hard for the casual fan to even recognize any of the Seahawks. Heck, the MVP Shaun Alexander is constantly mistaken for one of the Barber twins.

So does that mean the Seahawks win, because of The Curse of the Pitchman? I guess we'll find out, won't we?

Rockstar: American Idol

Watching American Idol right now. It's not as interesting as it was back in Season 1 (Kelly vs Sideshow Bob!) or Season 2 (Rueben vs Clay!); heck, the only reason I watch it is because there's really nothing else at 8pm Tuesdays or Wednesdays (gotta watch something while waiting for Lost).

I've also heard that Rockstar 2: is going to be out pretty soon. It got me thinking...how would JD, Marty et al have fared if they had gone to "auditions" for AI? Here's my take:

JD: Hollywood, just because of the smarmy looks (see: Constantine), which a lot of women would find "sexy" (ugh). Decent enough singer, I suppose.
Marty: Probably out. Just doesn't fit Simon's style. Can't imagine him doing fluffy pop.
Mig: Hmm, tough one. Might be too...um...effete for Simon, although the niceness might sway Paula and Randy. Oh, and too thea-tah.
Suzie: Big notes...definitely Hollywood.
Jordis: Hollywood. She has that "It" quality, and has a good-enough voice (just don't have her sing Aerosmith). Remember, she did Star Search, so she's done something like this before.
Deanna: Her voice is great, but the boobs would be the main reason she gets to Hollywood (see: Ashley Jackson, the "Fit" model from this season)
Ty: See Mig. The mohawk may have to go, though.
Jessica: Voice not so great, but the sexy factor gets her in.
Daphna: Pretty enough...but on the fringe. Probably not.
Heather: Hmm, tough call. I'd say no, and we get to watch her flip Simon off.
Tara: Strong voice, has the look. Hollywood.
Wil: Hollywood. The looks, and apparently the voice (I think). More a solo act than band material anyway, which is why RS: INXS didn't happen.
Brandon, Dana and Neal: Might wind up in the "so-bad-they're-good" AI special

Somehow, I doubt any of them would want to do AI anyway, but it's a fun exercise to think what would've happened.